A loss
by Katetodd4eva
Summary: A Christmas surprise is later met with heart ache. Established KIBBS. Missing scene/chapter in my Take 2 series.


Outside the snow was falling softly, as it always does this time of year. Kate and Gibbs were cuddled up together in their bed sound asleep. That was until a little body ran in and jumped on the bed.

"Santa was here. Santa was here. Up. Get up. Santa was here" Samuel, their four year old son chanted as he continued to jump on the bed.

"Okay, okay" Gibbs said as he sat up and grabbed his son.

"Daddy get up. Presents" he insisted making Gibbs laugh.

"Okay, we are up. Why don't you go downstairs and choose your first present, but don't open it" Gibbs instructed and the little boys face lit up with excitement.

"Okay Daddy, but hurry" he carefully climbed back off their bed and ran down stairs. Gibbs sat there for a moment and sighed, running his hands over his face. He didn't dare look at what time it was. He reached over and rubbed Kate's arm.

"You heard the man, time to get up" he told her and heard her groan as she tried to burry herself under the blankets. Gibbs laughed and rolled over.

"Come on, if I'm up you're up" he told her. He finally threw the blankets off and got up, pulled on a pair of t rack pants and jumper and headed downstairs. He found Samuel going through the presents and smiled.

"Have you chosen one?" Gibbs asked and the little boy stood up.

"Yes. And I got you and mommy one" he said cheerily. Gibbs nodded and headed for the kitchen to get a start on the coffee.

"Mommy will be down soon" he told the little boy as he came back to sit in the lounge room. Samuel grabbed the small present and ran over to his father, who picked him up and sat him in his lap.

"This one" he said handing it to Gibbs. He took it and looked at it.

"Do you know what it is?" he asked and shook it as it made a noise. Samuel giggled and shook his head.

"Open" he instructed.

"We have to wait for-," before he could finish his sentence Kate came down the stairs, wrapping her dressing gown tighter around her.

"Mommy is here" she said as she came to join them in the lounge room.

"Merry Christmas mommy" Samuel said happily as he jumped down from Gibbs' lap and ran over to Kate, who pulled him up into her lap and hugged him tight.

"Presents mommy" he wriggled off her lap and ran to the tree to grab a present for Kate and handed it to her.

"Thanks baby. Open yours first" she instructed him and he ran over to the small box he had placed in the centre of the room. He sat down and ripped off the wrapping as quickly as he could. His eyes lit up as he saw all the books.

"More. Bed time stories daddy" he said bouncing up and down.

"Look" he picked up the stack of books and ran over to Gibbs and handed them to him.

"Wow, look at that. We can start tonight even" he said with a small smile. Samuel put the books down and looked at his father.

"Daddy your turn" he grinned. Kate couldn't help but laugh. Since he met Santa three weeks ago at one of the shopping centres, he had been so eager for Christmas and made Kate and Gibbs watch every Christmas movie they could until the day arrived.

"Okay, here goes" he said as he opened his present. He tore the wrapping off to find a sleek looking box. He looked over at Kate who was watching him with a grin. He lifted the lid off it and there it was. A plastic stick. A plastic stick with a positive sign at the end of it. She watched his eyes go wide as he realised what he was looking at.

"Katie?" he said looking at her and she smiled even bigger and nodded.

"It's a stick?" Samuel said looking at it clearly confused. Gibbs put it on the coffee table.

"Go choose another one" he instructed the little boy, got up and walked over to where Kate was.

"We are having another baby?" he asked softly. She nodded.

"We are" she replied. He grinned and leaned down and kissed her.

"Best present ever" he told her, than kissed her again.

"Stop. Open presents" came Samuels voice as he started tugging on Gibbs' pants. Both Kate and Gibbs laughed and he pulled back.

"Alright, let's get these presents out of the way" he agreed as he sat back down and Samuel handed out more presents.

It wasn't until they were at Ducky's house for Christmas dinner, did Kate and Gibbs get some decent alone time to talk about his Christmas present. So while Samuel was occupied with Abby, Tony and McGee inside, Gibbs stole Kate and took her outside. Kate turned to him and smiled as she pulled her jacket tighter around her.

"When did you find out?" he asked almost straight away. Kate smiled and shrugged her shoulders.

"About five weeks now. I wanted to tell you, but I also wanted it to be part of your present" she smiled. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer to him and kissing her head.

"I like the surprise" he told her softly. She relaxed more into him, her head resting on his chest.

"I was actually worried about telling you" she admitted. He tried to pull back and look at her but she held on to him so he couldn't.

"Why?" she could hear the worry and hurt in his voice.

"Jethro it's nothing that you have said or done, but the three of us, we work well. We have our routine and it's easy. I was worried that you wouldn't want to add more to that" she said softly. He was finally able to pull her away from him so he could look her in the eyes.

"Katie, I would never say no to having more" he told her and she smiled. She was feeling rather silly, thinking he wouldn't be happy about the new addition.

"I know a part of me knew that, but we just never talked about it" Gibbs nodded, as it was true. They had never really talked about expanding their family. He pulled her tight against him again and he felt her whole body relax.

"I love you" he said softly. She wrapped her arms around him tightly.

"Love you too Jethro" they were enjoying the quiet moment they had until they heard Ziva and Ducky announce that dinner was ready.

12 weeks later

Kate was at her desk enjoying the quiet. Gibbs and her both came to an agreement that when she reached 20 weeks she would agree to desk duty only. She wasn't as young as she was before when she had Samuel so she was at a higher risk of losing this baby and didn't want to risk it. She looked over at Chuck and Balboa who both seemed bored, they hadn't had a case in over three weeks.

Gibbs' team on the other hand was stilling going on a case they had caught a week and a half ago. Even though he was busy he still found time to call her multiple times throughout the day to check up on her. She smiled to herself as she thought about it.

The smile quickly faded when she felt an ache in her abdomen. She paused thinking it may have gone away, or perhaps in was her bladder telling her it was finally time get up and go to the bathroom. Again. When the pain came back it was stronger this time, causing her to grab her stomach. She took a deep breath and let it out again, hoping it really would go away, but it didn't. She stood up and winced as it got worse. This time she had gotten the attention of Balboa and Chuck.

"Kate, what's wrong? Should I get Gibbs?" Balboa asked quickly picking up his phone and waited for the go ahead. Kate nodded as she let out another breath.

"Something's wrong" she finally said through gritted teeth. The pain was now something she could not bear. It wasn't like being shot, but it certainly didn't tickle. She tried to walk out from behind her desk, but after taking a few steps she hunched over in pain, thankfully Chuck was there to grab her and helped her sit on the floor.

"Gibbs! You need to get up here. No, just get up here now" Balboa said, clearly panicked. He had never seen her like this before. And knowing she is pregnant with abdomen pain, it was not a good sign. He picked up the phone again, this time dialling 911.

After what only seemed like seconds, Gibbs burst through the elevator doors, saw Chuck and Kate on the floor and ran over.

"Kate, what's wrong? What's happened?" he asked quickly. Chuck moved, getting up off the floor and leaving Gibbs to comfort his wife. She looked up at him through teary eyes, her face hot and flushed.

"Something's wrong. I know it" she said before groaning in pain again. He quickly looked at her body, it was clear she was in pain. He helped her sit up a little bit more, and that's when he saw it. Her skirt had moved up her thigh slightly and he saw the faint red line on her inner thigh. He looked up at her, her eyes on him, watching him. He tried to control his face but it was clear he hadn't when she started to cry even more.

"Jethro no. I'm so sorry" she cried uncontrollably. Seeing his wife like this broke his heart. He moved up next to her and held her tight. He kissed her head and rubbed her back. He looked over at Chuck and Balboa for help.

"Ambos on their way" Balboa informed him. Chuck walked out of the squad room, only to return a short time later with a blanket. He put it over Kate up to her waste, to try and stop her from looking. Balboa and Chuck then had to act like crowd control, ushering other workers on so they wouldn't stop and ask questions. It was when the elevator doors opened and two ambos with a stretcher walked out, Balboa greeted them first.

"So my co-worker here is roughly 15-20 weeks pregnant. She had some severe stomach pain before collapsing to the floor. Her husband noticed the bleeding, so I'm thinking possibly a miscarriage" he told them softly so they had an idea of what was going on. They both nodded and walked over to Kate.

Kate laid on her side staring out at the window. The weather a miserable grey, just like how she was feeling inside. She could hear people talking outside her bedroom door, and she knew it would be about her. She didn't care. What she cared about was the baby she had just lost. How her body had let her down.

She heard the door open and close and soft footsteps walk over to her bed.

"Katie?" came Gibbs' soft voice. She couldn't do it. She couldn't be strong. She let out a sniffle as the tears flowed down her face again. Gibbs climbed onto the hospital bed behind her and pulled her to him. She rolled over and buried her face in his chest. He wrapped an arm around her, kissed her head, trying to soothe her pain, though he knew from past experience there was nothing that helped. After a few minutes she pulled back to look at him.

"I'm so sorry Jethro" she said softly. Gibbs wiped at her tears and shook his head.

"Shhh don't apologise. This is not your fault. Could have happened to anyone" he told her. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"I didn't want to ever put you through this again" the tears started again. He leaned down and kissed her. He didn't know what else to do. She was beating herself up because she was now the reason why he has lost two children. He finally pulled back and looked her in the eyes.

"You are not to blame. You did not do this. Yes it's horrible and yes it hurts, but this is not your fault. So please, Katie. Stop blaming yourself. I don't" he told her. She paused as what he said sunk in and she nodded. She moved closer to him, wanting to get as close as she possibly could to his warmth and his smell. He patted her head and was thankful that her breathing had finally calmed.

"I still have you and Samuel. How can I ever blame you for something like this, when you have given me a new life" he said softly. She leaned up and kissed him.

"I love you. So very much" she said, looking up at him through her still teary eyes. He managed a small smile as he moved her hair off her face.

"Love you too. So very much" he leaned down and kissed her once more.


End file.
